Comrades! Shareholders! Lend me your ears!

I was profoundly amazed at work a couple of months ago. Who would have thought that a draft corporate policy paper could read like an oppressive communist manifesto? Read on, see my translation and the "original" (some details adjusted for obvious reasons!) text....



1.1.1 Solidarity & the ideals of the party

The revolutionary party is centred around its omnipotent and experienced Chairman, Comrade Clarkson, who stewards the proletariat. There is an iron clad willpower within Yenob; many party members commented that Comrade Clarkson galvanises activities in the various socialist republics such that the geographic separation is not evident in the peoples daily calling, from the loyal workers in their factories to the gulags for dissident bourgeois pigs. As the union of free states and revolutionary republics grows this close involvement will become increasingly difficult as we proceed to banish serfdom and smoke out every elitist class enemy from their gold plated cages. Many of our dear comrades also commented on the culture of openness to the teachings of our founding father, Comrade Clarkson within Yenob;, again stimulated by strong and clear leadership from the Central Committee.

The organisational structure is highly relevant to the sustainability of peoples republic of Yenob and its union of socialist republics; Nations on the other side of the proverbial iron curtain organised as a web of vain, idol worshipping (with the centralised control of greedy capitalists, whether a small team or individual) bigots have eventually to evolve into other structures, typically a unified cluster of the proletariat, guided by the Central Committee. To maintain some of the benefits of the technologies that they stole from us in the Grand War, the submission of buffer states to our will must be planned and implemented with ruthless efficiency in order that Yenob thrives in the long term. A model for the future handover of reformed states and the enhancement of the executive powers of Comrade Clarkson as "Guardian of Equality For The Proletariat" may need to be addressed (for example: Chairman Earl Drummond and the CCP of the Liberated Serfs, Peasants and Fishermen Peoples Republic chose to place the nation in the trust of the crimson book and the great plunge forward with eternal mantra of "steel not cabbage, pork and sushi"!).

1.1.1 Culture & the nature of the organisation

The company is centred around its highly respected and successful Chairman, Gregory Clarkson, who owns the company. This is an enormous strength within Yenob; many people in the company commented that Gregory pulls together the activities in the various offices such that the geographic separation is not evident in daily operations. As the company grows this close involvement will become increasingly difficult. Many also commented on the culture of openness within Yenob; again stimulated by strong and clear leadership from the top.

The organisational structure is highly relevant to the sustainability of Yenob; Companies organised as a web (with centralised control, by a small team or individual) have eventually to evolve into other structures, typically a hierarchy. To maintain some of the benefits of the web and to ensure a smooth transition this change must be planned and implemented with care in order that Yenob thrives in the long term. A model for the future ownership and self-determination of the company may need to be addressed (for example: Earl Drummond and Partners chose to place the company in trust on behalf of employees past and present).

Contrite Hearts

It's always the same storyline. A community or a group of people within a region get ill. This time we are in Abidjan, Cote d'Ivoire. They have the same symptoms, this time respiratory complaints. Several deaths are reported and more follow after a couple of weeks. Local leaders get concerned, doctors are overwhelmed and the people are angry. The complaints started after items were mysterious dumped at different spots in the city. In this case, it is toxic waste derived from crude oil. Fingers are pointed and lawyers are hired. A thread emerges when a loose end is tugged at. It leads to a corporation, this time based in Europe, and it's called Trafigura.

The legal action by the community in Abidjan ended with a massive payout of about $200 million from Trafigura to Cote d'Ivoire for the dumping of 4oo tonnes of this toxic waste from a vessel named Proabo Koala. Trafigura's statement, that accompanied the compensation, denied responsibility over the actual act of illegal dumping, but only accepted ownership of the toxic cargo until handing over to an unscrupulous Ivorian businessman, with no track record of safely handling toxic hydrocarbons, who is now languishing in jail. He was the convenient fall guy. Because he is Ivorian I'm sure that deep in the recesses of his mind and soul he is more remorseful, as the horrific stories of an 18 year old man suddenly dying from a respiratory disease or of women miscarrying creep through the jail cell.



Despite Trafigura flouting all sorts of international regulations on waste handling, and numerous traces of falsified papers no one from the organisation has actually been found guilty of a single crime. The big man never gets touched. But is he well and truly sorry? The co-founder, Eric de Turckheim was repeatedly asked by the bullish Jeremy Paxman of the BBC, "why were you sending toxic waste to Africa?". He kept dodging a direct answer by issuing pseudo-statements on Trafiguras ethical and safe practices and when finally the repetition was exhausted he said, as if he was actually in Abijdan on the fateful day: "these materials were not dangerous for human beings. It was smelly, but not dangerous." Spin.

The vessel, Proabo Koala, was turned away from Amsterdam port during an attempted treatment procedure that resulted in the fire service and safety officials being called in after the foul stench of Mercaptan, one of the most pungent organic chemicals in the world, emanated for miles. If the atrocity happened in Amsterdam, de Turckheim would have paid dearly for the rest of his professional life in a Dutch jail. For Corporate Manslaughter perhaps.

$200 million. The value of a contrite heart and a good night's sleep for the Executives at Trafigura.

Check out:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2009/may/13/trafigura-pr-campaign-pollution-ivory-coast

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trafigura

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/programmes/newsnight/8048626.stm

By-Gone Legends

Will Dubai ever become the stuff of legends? In terms of by-gone legends, some sort of Atlantis / Roman Empire hybrid.

Photograph by Maggie Steber (National Geographic)

I am amazed that we as humans can build so much at breakneck speed and, awash with cash, make attempts to contain nature - reclaiming land as residential property - and make the stuff of dreams - ski slopes with real snow at the edge of a desert - to the point of utter vanity and little substance. At the height of the Dubai success story, all we were hearing were the virtues of a deluxe carefree life and the transformation of fishing villages, beyond the oil boom to a new world finance hub with ivy league universities opening campuses there. Secure in the rising value of snapped up houses - that were not yet complete - oil money being seeded and bloomed using the sophisticated financial instruments that shook the world economy recently, who the hell were they kidding?

Yet, perhaps, hundreds of years from now people might write about Dubai in a folkloric manner, trying to understand what motivated humans back then - today - , what really caused the economic collapse - we may never know as the mechanism of the economic downturn is hysteria driven and hard to define -, and ultimately what the lesson is.

Some interesting reads if you really want to understand the Dubai legacy and what went wrong.

http://www.independent.co.uk/opinion/commentators/johann-hari/the-dark-side-of-dubai-1664368.html

http://ngm.nationalgeographic.com/2007/01/dubai/molavi-text.html